It's Not Cute, It's Hooch

When we talk about fashion it is best to know what that word means. Fashion isn't just what you wear. It's about what current trend you are wearing. So what trend is summer 2011 spitting at us? Well, I tell you it's not cute. That's for sure. This summer and my uber sensitive eyes have been filled with hooch. That's right! Hooch! Girls who forgot how to dress themselves in any way other than the way that would be perfect on a street corner are floundering around looking down right hoochie. Let's face it. There is always going to be that but it seems to be abundant this year. I mean, it's hot but it's not that hot so why can I see your butt cheeks? I know right? The last thing you expect to see when you walk into a Baskin Robbins is some girl's butt cheeks. Not because her shorts are falling down but because her shorts are so short it's shorter than "short shorts." Super short shorts are for some reason "in" with today's youth. This isn't a rap video where hoochie is common. It's the damn ice cream shoppe! Put on some effin' pants because you know it's cold up in here anyway. Speaking of butt cheeks, the most appalling thing happened the other day. Some girl who thought she was so the bomb in her bikini (okay, she was the bomb in her bikini when she was on the beach) walks into a convenience store. Maybe she had one of those awesome beach shirts that you can see through which is fine. But this chica comes in with her bikini bottoms on and no shorts switching her tiny money maker all over the place. Bikini's are for the beach. Once you leave the sandy ocean sides and filthy brown lakes it's time to put your clothes back on. Don't waltz back into society thinking this is an episode of "Baywatch." Even on that show, they put their clothes back on. This "let my ass hang out" fashion trend is really just ridiculous and amazingly abundant this summer. Apparently mothers don't give a flip about their daughters looking like they are about to work the streets for a few hours and fathers want dirty old men to hit on their precious little girls. For the record ladies, hooch is not cute. Cover up the backside before your anus catches a cold.